Sunday, May 13, 2012

On Joining the Club

For a very, very long time I longed to join the club of women I experienced every day.  They were a diverse group, some older than I, some younger - belonging to a group that I just wanted to be a part of so badly.  There was nothing I could do to meet the initiation requirements of this club - I just had to wait.  That was the hardest, the waiting and not being able to join.

On September 4, 2010 I finally, finally earned my place in their ranks.

At 6:42 p.m. that evening I became a mother.  Suddenly, in the bowels of Detroit International Airport my initiation was complete, and my son was placed in my arms. It was amazing.  It was everything that I had imagined it could be, an more.  I had joined the club.

Today marks my second Mother's Day, the second time I get to celebrate joining this group of women.  My husband and son (and my Mom!) made me feel so special, appreciated and cherished today, even more so than on other days.  We celebrated well today.

In all the joy and celebrating this day now holds for me, I want to be clear that I have not forgotten the sisterhood from which I came.  I have not forgotten the tears and heartbreaking emptiness this day brought for oh-so-long.  While I celebrated today, I also cried for the women for whom it is not yet time for Motherhood.  I cried remembering the feeling of missing someone - some little person I had not even met - and then feeling like I was crazy missing someone I didn't know.  It's not crazy.  It's part of being a mother.

To my sisters in waiting I want to share this.
It's worth it.  It is amazingly, beautifully, worth it.

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